One fry short of a Happy Meal. Not the brightest bulb in the drawer. One apple short of an orchard. Not the sharpest tool in the shed. There are a lot of ways to say someone’s dumb, but we’ll let these deranged stories speak for themselves.

1. Reach For The Moon

I was moving my wife down to Texas after I’d gotten settled with the job and apartment. She took pictures the whole way. In West Texas, it was super flat, and the moon was barely above the horizon in front of us. It was beautiful so I asked her to take some pics. She pulled out the camera, took a pic or two, and put it away.

I asked if she got a good pic. She said no, it was blurry. So I asked why she didn’t take more to get a good one. Her response was legendary. She told me she was waiting until we drove closer to the moon to get a better picture. She literally thought since the moon was above the road in front of us, we would drive closer to it for a better picture.


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